The Wicked Binky Fairy of the Midwest

Conversation from this morning:

"Lyla, this weekend the Binky Fairy is coming to give you a present."

"Pezzant!"

"Yeah! But we have to give her all of your binkies."

"Yeah." Pause. Vigorous head shake. "No."

"Lyla, the Binky Fairy needs binkies from all the big girls so she can give them to little babies."

"No babies. No binty faiwy."

Uh oh.

So tonight Julie and I declared psychological war. I took the three binkies from her nursery and snipped their tips. Here's one; look closely:


As it turns out, I snipped just enough to make them totally unacceptable.




When she discovered that all three were the same, she surprised us with her critical thinking.


But unfortunately, she soon discovered that washing them didn't help.

"No me like it!"

"You don't like binkies anymore?"

"Ha!"

Ha? That was unexpected.

"Lyla, you must be a big girl if you don't like binkies."

"Ha ha!"

Clearly she was insane. I didn't realize psychological warfare worked so instantly.

We put her to bed with a blanket and her three marred binkies. She shouted/talked/whined for 20 minutes, but now she's asleep. We'll see what happens when she inevitably wakes up, sticks a binky in her mouth, and rediscovers her new hatred for them. It could be a long night. Or not. Regardless, this weekend I bet she'll be eager to wrap up a nice tidy package for the Binky Fairy.