Breaking up

Lyla is reading Elmo's 12 Days of Christmas, otherwise known as the most annoying book to read in April. It's a leading contender for December, too.

This afternoon I had a secret rendezvous at Lyla's new daycare to turn in the paperwork and deposit check. She'll start there two days a week in the middle of June. We still haven't told Lyla's current daycare that we met someone new, had an affair, and are packing our bags.

Julie's making me tell them. I don't mind at all; I've never broken up with somebody for somebody else. It was always "Let's see other people" but without the vaguest notion of who the "other people" would be. Plus I was always faithful to even my cruelest, most incompatible girlfriends, so it'll be titillating to say "We've been cheating on you with another daycare."

I wonder if the director will cry. I'll be sure to say to her, "It's not us, it's your insane prices." I hope there will be some Jerry Springer elements. Maybe she'll throw a stapler at me.