Pack 'n Play woes

That's Lyla showing where her beard is. Father of the year, right here, ladies and gentlemen.

When Lyla was a teeny baby, we had grand plans to teach her to sleep in all sorts of locations. "That way, we can go on vacation with her, plop her in the Pack 'n Play in the hotel bathroom or whatever, and watch cable while she snoozes," was roughly our line of thinking.

Now that she is almost 20 months old and two days away from a family reunion overnight in a Duluth hotel room, I figure it's high time I start teaching her to sleep in the Pack 'n Play.

Yes, start. It's been a year since our last overnight trip together as a whole family. Lyla doesn't remember it, but she was shorter then and not so opinionated. Oh, and by the way: all those best intentions of teaching the kid to sleep all over the place don't amount to anything in the real world. On any given day, a sane person will choose the guaranteed nap in the crib over the child sobbing and screaming in the playpen.

"Yes, but why did you wait to..." Just hush, okay? A sane parent chooses the guaranteed nap in the crib. Maybe all those Earth mothers you know are not sane.

Do I sound a bit defensive? Yeah, so it's playpen boot camp today, and Lyla is finally asleep. After a morning at the zoo and a sleepy car ride home, I gently lowered her into the Pack 'n Play with binkies and blankies and stuffed animals, and Lyla completely freaked her shit. I hugged her, put her back down and left, resolved to not go back in for 10 minutes. Within 5 she was talking to herself, occasionally whining, but nothing that would ever justify me going back in there. This went on for an hour. She never went to sleep.

Lunch. Play. Tired child. New nap attempt and she freaked her shit once more. Ten minutes downstairs listening to angry jungle sounds in the monitor. Back upstairs to replenish thrown binkies and comfort the beast. And now she's finally asleep for real, two hours past her normal nap time. I hope it lasts. Definitely, definitely should've made the Pack 'n Play part of her routine much earlier.

We'll do it right with our second child. (That is a lie.)