Seven-year itch

It's our anniversary today. I'm supposed to be feeling the seven-year itch, but that wouldn't be fair considering a seedling baby is living inside Julie. And what is there to itch for, anyway?

I ordered flowers delivered to Julie at work, and they arrived with this note: "Happy anniversaty! Love, Dan." When the flower girl misspelled anniversary, I wonder if she looked at the squiggly red line under it and thought, "Oh that's neat. It automatically underlines the occasion, just like with those birfday flowers yesterday."

Julie got the call that there was a flower delivery for her in the lobby and thought to herself, "Why am I getting flowers?" Ladies and gentlemen, she did not remember this special, special day. Do you think we have some gender role issues in this household? Here I am at home preparing the meals and taking care of the child, and there she is in her corporate job forgetting our anniversary.

She came home and said, "My gift to you is the fetus."

The heat is getting to me lately; I'm looking for more and more indoor activities with Lyla. It's ridiculous because come winter I'm going to long for sunshine. Temperatures in the high 80s and 90s, though, are oppressive. So today I took Lyla to Edinborough Park, an indoor play area in Edina. They have a bouncy castle and a huge structure with slides and stuff to climb on.

Here she is in the bouncy castle:


She kept saying "Dump dump dump!" (translation: "Jump jump jump!") and then she would fall on her face and laugh herself silly.

Then in the play structure, we actually climbed pretty high in it (last winter we stayed on the ground and did baby things) and went down some stupidly bendy slides. I don't think they are made for tall people; there's one I have titled the Poor Man's Chiropractor because of how I had to bend myself just to get down it.

Before long, there was a desperate request for snacks. We doused ourselves in hand sanitizer first.


While the place is well maintained, you don't get the impression that it's actually clean, what with the sweaty, unsupervised kids who may or may not have shit in their pants. It is somehow worth it, though. We'll go back as long as we don't end up with E. coli or a staph infection or a seven-year itch or something.